A couple weekends ago my dad asked my mom for a separation. Lets not mince words... what he meant was a divorce. I feel the need to sit down and write out my thoughts, beliefs, and some history, not so much as a catharsis for me, but rather to give others perspective.
As news of this divorce gets around I find very few people responding appropriately. I think that's the word I want. I don't mean this in a "They are acting unkindly" sort of inappropriate, but rather they either don't share my world view or if they do share my world view they are in the dark and don't understand the circumstances which have led us here.
I was not completely surprised when I heard the news. It didn't shatter my little world and I didn't even feel angry. To be honest I felt a little relieved. Is this shocking and if so why?
What do I believe? I believe that Jesus Christ is my Savior and only hope. The entirety of the Bible is God's inerrant word. I don't care what society is like now, nothing has changed! If you pick and choose what to believe out of the Bible rather than accept it as a whole, who is deeming what is and isn't true? A flawed and sinful human being who without Jesus has no hope just like me!
So if I believe the Bible, what does it say about divorce? The Pharisees asked Jesus about it in Matthew 19 and he's pretty clear about not being a fan. Divorce shouldn't happen. By Biblical standards, most people who are divorced shouldn't be (that's just the Christians. I don't expect a non-Christian to live by Christian principles). Marriage is repeatedly used as an allegory of the church's relationship with Christ and thus shouldn't be taken lightly. (Read Ephesians 5:22-33) A man divorcing his wife is like Christ giving up on the church (which he wouldn't do!) A wife divorcing her husband is like the church deciding that it is good enough to make it without Christ (which we are not!)
The Bible does lay out a couple of circumstances to which divorce is condoned. In Matthew 19:9 Jesus mentions that if one partner is sexually immoral then the other may divorce them. The other exception I find is in 1 Corinthians 7:15-16. "But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?" In other words, if the person who asks for the divorce is not a Christian, then a divorce is not going against God's commands.
I'm not claiming to be an expert on this by any means. I'm still studying it. But whatever the Bible says is what I will choose to believe. I have a lot more to say, most of which is a lot more personal and about my parents' particular situation. Hopefully I will get a chance to write more in the next few days!
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